Do Hard Things

We spent $15 a bracelet for four kids to ride carnival rides for four hours at the Wathena Fall Festival. It's the final highlight of the summer for the girls. As we were standing in line and the girls were pairing up to ride with friends or each other Barney's cousin's little boy ran up to Morgan and asked to ride with her. Morgan is the tallest of my girls and the third one. She has the most compassionate heart and loves little kids. She turned and walked away without speaking to him. I was irritated to say the least. I could not get her to get on that ride with him and I told her she was being rude and I was embarrassed. She stood her ground and refused to get on. I asked what she wanted to ride and she said nothing. I assumed she was mad because no one else asked her or she didn't want to go on this ride so I was less than patient with her. Barney told me to drop it, but I don't. One thing I hate is rudeness and the other close runner-up is pouting because you don't get your way. I am the only female in the house that has a pass to do that. I was going to win this argument. I told her we would just go home if she was going to pout all night and she said, "lets go". Crap. Not what I wanted to do. I turned to Barney and told him I wasn't sure why we wasted money to bring kids that don't appreciate it. It was less than lovely sounding and he told me to keep it down I was making an ass out of myself.

I spent the next few minutes bugging Morgan and it finally spilled. She was too scared. Too scared? Morgan you rode roller coasters at Disney World. Granted I lied and told her they were like riding a train, but I didn't want her to miss out. She survived and liked it. I tried to get her to remember how much fun we had. She wasn't budging. I was wondering what the heck she would do for four hours. She is 8 and as tall as a middle school student. She doesn't exaclty fit in the kiddie rides. I resorted to bribes..a game, a toy, $5, anything. Barney still embarrassed I was being relentless told me to go where there were less people. Morgan and I sat on the wall by City Hall and I reminded her of all the scary things she had done. Grandma even offered to ride with her. Finally, she caved and she asked me to get on with her. We slid in our car and buckled up. Smiled for a picture She held my hand, closed her eyes and shook. The ride took off and her lip quivered and her eyes welled up with tears.  I just talked about anything. I slowly lowered and lifted our car, she kept her eyes closed. She opened them and asked me to promise not to lift the car the whole time. I told her I already had been. She looked around and we were above the crowd and she could look down. She let out the air she had been holding and started to relax. She finally smiled at the end of the ride. We started to get off and I told her I was sorry for being mean about it. She said, "Mommy you weren't mean. Thank you for making me I am not scared anymore."

Five years ago Morgan and I rode a ride when she was three. She's tall for her age. The guy said she would do fine. It took all I had to keep her in the car. She almost flew out of the Octopus three times that day. I had to sit on her. Her fear is not irrational, but it was holding her back. I didn't want her to miss out.

Lauren is my oldest. We are not naturally athletic. We don't have family history of winning trophies or breaking records. We play for fun and we have to work hard. Sports is not her thing but in small town America it's a fun way to hang out with all of your friends. She came home the first day of practice with her head down. She couldn't get her serve to even touch the net. She would probably be on the C team and she was disappointed. One thing I tell my kids is that attitude and determination can make or break you. A lesson I learned a little late in life.  I reminded her to practice every day. I bought her a volleyball. She made the B team. She can dig out a ball and makes pretty good passes. I showed up a few minutes late to her game last week. It's a long drive and I had to wait for the girls to get off the bus. Barney had a visitation to attend. I walked in as Lauren missed the last serve of the B team and they lost. I saw her smile and say "oh well" and hug another player. She was quickly scolded by another girl for not caring. If I know Lauren she cares. She's not going to let it eat her. I remember thinking I could have stayed home to get work done but would stay to cheer on the A team. Afterall, we drove an hour and we paid to get in. Lauren ran over to me and I pulled out my wallet to give her money. She leaned over and whispered she would be suiting up A Team. I told Morgan we better get a diet pepsi and some popcorn. I had the nervous munchies. Lauren started the first game. She never subbed out. She played the full second game. She missed some and she made some good plays. I ate the whole bag of popcorn and shook my leg like a dog for an hour. I think I finally breathed in the car. I told her to move her feet more next time and congratulations.  I did like any mother would do. I got in the car, drove away and cried. She did it. She worked hard. She kept a good attitude and did more than she ever thought possible. Is she the best player? No. Are there others who are good, better? Yes. She was asked by another player, "Why the (not nice word) did you get picked to play A Team." Why didn't she?  Attitude and determination will make or break you.

Rio is our new addition to the family Haley is my second oldest and she has loved horses since the first day she laid on eyes on them. She was given a free horse and she could hardly sleep for weeks. She had lots of plans for Rio. She was going to ride him and hang out with him every day. Rio is a massive animal. It's not like walking a dog or holding a cat. They turn and eat when they want to. Neither Barney or I are horse people. We are all learning. I noticed Haley would ask us to lead him. She would feed him, pet him, brush him, but she would never lead him. She was scared. She wouldn't ride him without us leading him. She let his size and sometimes stubborn attitude terrify her. You get the point by now. Haley will lead Rio and no we will not do it for her. She has to show him she is in control. She will fake it until she makes it and will develop those muscles.



I was 23, married for 4 years, mother of two with one on the way before I every walked in to my own home after dark alone. Barney worked nights so I had to be strategic. I came home before dark, drove around until he got home, or stayed with my parents until he got there. Few people knew. It was a crippling fear I had since I was a kid. My first night I decided to do it. I walked from the car with Lauren and Haley in my arms and said "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" over and over until I made it in the house, checked every bed and flipped on every light. I even go to Wal-Mart at night alone now.

There are hard things God has called us to do. Hard things I feel him tug on my heart and tell me to do or to say. The what-if's scare me, the process scares me, the people scare me and my own failure scare me. God says Go. He knows the nay-sayers, he knows the mockers, the self-righteous, the legalistic, he knows all the reasons why I am not qualified or should be disqualified, he knows my past, he knows my present, he knows my sins, my hang ups, and he still says Go.

He wants to know who will go. He's looking at our heart, not our qualifications.

Isaiah 6:8 Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”

And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

He promises that he "has not give us a spirit of fear but of power and love and
 of sound mine (2 Timothy 1:7)

I don't know what your hard thing is. It may seem easy to others but it's your hard thing. I have mine and maybe it's easy for you. He promises to go with us.  Right after he tells us to go in Matthew he says..
"And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age" Matthew 28:19

He's sitting in that carnival ride car, he's coaching you, he's letting you take the reigns without ever leaving his sight or his care.He qualifies you and equips you.